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Saturday, January 25, 2014

How to choose your wedding date



Recently, The Knot posted this article about dates you might want to consider skipping when selecting your wedding day.

The religious and cultural holidays seemed the most appropriate to consider. I know when my husband and I got married, several of my relatives on my Jewish father’s side couldn’t make it because our date happened to be a Holy day that year. We would have loved to have those relatives with us, but we chose our date because it had special significance to us as a couple, and any other date wouldn’t have meant as much to us. But if your family is especially religious, or you know a holy or special date would be a real conflict for many of your potential guests, it’s certainly worth keeping that in mind when selecting the date for your big day.

The article mentions many three-day weekends, but I actually like weddings on three-day weekends because it usually means that you can spend more time with the people you came to see. And if you traveled for the wedding, it gives you an extra day to explore the area and/or make the return trip so you don’t have to take off of workunless you want to, though often people can’t.

Certain dates, September 11 among them, I can see because they are sensitive for some people, rightly so. My personal opinion is that dates like that should be filled with as many new, happy memories as possible; though if you or your family were directly affected, you may want to gauge whether or not anyone would be offended. We went to a wedding on September 11, 2010 and it was a wonderful celebration. September 11 existed as a potential wedding day before 2001 and all of those people still celebrate it as their anniversary; I don’t think it needs to be automatically taken off the table.


Last year, my mother-in-law remarried on New Year’s Eve. Before they firmed up the date, they asked everyone they were inviting (less than 100 people) if they would be willing to travel during the holiday. Everyone was enthusiastic about coming, regardless of the holiday. The ceremony started at 6p, the reception at 7p and ran until 11:30 at night when the décor was switched over in the cocktail area, champagne and desserts were put out, and boas, top hats, confetti, and streamers made for a great way to ring in the new year all together. My husband’s cousin held his wedding on December 27, and everyone traveled for that, too. We brought our Christmas presents with us (my husband’s uncle’s birthday is also Christmas Day) and we just made the whole week a huge family celebration. If you have your heart set on a holiday wedding, check with your friends and family first. You may have a few people who aren’t able or willing to attend, but I bet most people would.

There are some dates in the article that seem a little out there though:

Like checking with your parents about having to share Mother’s or Father’s Day weekends? Do people treat Mother’s and Father’s Days so solemnly that they cannot be shared with any other event? That seems like the biggest stretch of all in the article. They also mention considering that you’d be sharing your own anniversary with those days, were you to have kids, but I think that just sounds like a nice full weekend of celebrating the people and relationships that mean the most.

No matter what date you choose, it will be a beautiful day and you’ll be surrounded by friends and family who love you, and that trumps everything.

What date did you choose and were there any you actively avoided?



Photo: SimpleandStunning2 via Etsy

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